I miss my little girl…

Saturday night my sweet little teddy bear, Emily Jane, died very suddenly and unexpectedly.

I don’t know what was wrong with her, what she’d had going on inside of her little body, but she’d seemed fine. One of those things, I guess.

The wound is still fresh, and the gaping hole left behind in my heart is going to take time to heal, but I’m glad that whatever suffering she might’ve endured during her final hours is over.

I hate the fact that my wife had to come home and find her dead. And that I had to finish my shift at work(five more hours)before I could go home and take her to the vet for cremation.

She’s survived by two other pugs, her best friend Siu Mai, and her biological daughter Lana. They don’t seem to know what’s happening yet, but all three of them were so close that I’m sure it’ll be quite an adjustment.

Every time one of my pets dies, I take solace in the fact that I took great care of them and made their lives comfortable and happy ones.

They’re only with us for a short time, and as they begin to age I find myself cherishing every moment, even the annoying ones.

Emily will never jump up and down in front of the counter below the treat jar barking for a reward (We called it “bossy barking”)after going potty outside. She’ll never again get behind the shed in the backyard and make me scratch my arms up trying to squeeze between the bushes surrounding it to retrieve her. She’ll never do any of the bratty little things she used to do, and I’ll miss them.

She was the cuddliest, most affectionate of all the pugs I’ve ever had the privilege of “owning.” She loved to lie across my stomach on the couch and growl at horses, kids, sirens and basketball on TV.

She wasn’t the brightest dog, but that was part of her charm, that goofy derpiness and happy little face.

When I got up this morning to feed the dogs, there was no bossy barking, just silence and an empty spot where her bed once sat. I broke down but quickly composed myself for the other “kids.” They lost their best friend. They’re still alive. And I will cherish every moment.

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