Writers get on my nerves.

Online, anyway. On social media. Buncha fuckin’ self-important claptrap.

I’ll have someone like my Facebook page and comment like “Hey, I liked your page! Like mine back!”

I don’t know you. Maybe you suck. Congratulations, you’re all following each other and sharing each other’s posts. Now what? Readers don’t know you exist. You’re just proclaiming to each other how much you love the smell of your own farts, and dispensing advice on how to “stand out” by being just like everybody else. You’re shouting into a vacuum. Your thinking is one-dimensional. You demonstrate a lack of empathy by failing to understand that what works for you and your writing might not work for someone else. You can’t see past the end of your own nose and that leads me to believe that all of your characters are just like you. How boring.

I’d rather share and promote people’s work that I actually like and respect. Planet Pailly, for example. Or River Dixon, among many others I’ve discovered here on WordPress. Those are two writers I’d like to see stand out. I don’t want to contribute to the proliferation of mediocrity by sharing bullshit. If you write bullshit, I want your readers. The money they’d spend on your book? I want it. I want to profit off of your failure. You’re cluttering up the market and I plan to poach your readers. I don’t feel any inherent sense of kinship with “fellow writers.” Why should I? What do I have in common with them? I started down that road, but it’s a dead end. I’m turning back and taking an alternate route. Y’all keep forging ahead, cruising down circle jerk highway.

Everybody wants to be a literary hero. I’ll be the villain. Reach for the sky.

9 thoughts on “Writers get on my nerves.

  1. I saw the same thing in my brief foray into Twitter. Not everyone, I hate to generalize, but a whole lot of people that were all about “look at me.” And worse than that was the terrible writing advice I witnessed being passed around like the gospel. Boring is right.

    Thanks for the mention.

  2. Oh for sure not everyone. Just enough for me to go “Fuck, who cares???” Lol. I mean “look at me” is cool when you make it entertaining. I do “look at me” but I at least try to make it entertaining or real and strip away all pretense and show the ugly side too. The gospel writing advice irks me because it’s so stupid. I read an argument between people about whether or not it was beneficial to listen to music while writing. And people were like “Well, I think if it’s classical it’s ok” or “Actually it hinders your creativity” and all this shit. I can’t personally listen to music while writing but some people do and it works great for them. Why would I assume everyone is like me and lecture people about it. I mean, mind your own business, shit

  3. I want to scream at people who ask if it’s “ok” to do certain things. It’s like, well, do you WANT to write in present tense? Does it feel natural? Do it! Don’t let these people tell you what to do.

  4. One of my favorites was a conversation I came across where someone was asking if they should get a cat because Hemingway had a cat. Apparently, many famous writers had cats, so the consensus was a resounding hell yes!

  5. For sure. And you need to drink 2.87 cups of tea every morning because that’s what Fitzgerald did.

    I’m not a big fan of tea and my cat died. Guess I’m fucked. Now I have to work hard to be original. Shit.

  6. I enjoy your page because you say off the cuff stuff that comes out of your head. Whether or not I agree with some of it is irrelevant, I appreciate people genuinely speaking their minds and making it interesting to read. Everybody wants to be some PC copy & paste Whitey Politey. Imagine what Mark Twain would be like on social media. That’s the kind of content I’m interested in seeing.

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