My OCD isn’t OCD anymore.

By the time I turned five, I was already exhibiting the textbook symptoms of original formula OCD Classic: excessive handwashing, fear of contamination, counting, checking, etc. My behavior wasn’t recognized as OCD at the time because it wasn’t really something that existed in the consciousness of the general public until many years later. None of the counselors or psychologists I was taken to seemed to … Continue reading My OCD isn’t OCD anymore.

That time I got trapped in a burning parking garage

I hate driving downtown, and I avoid it entirely unless I’m legally compelled to do so. So far I’ve been legally compelled to do so four times; jury duty. This last time that I served, I beat the traffic by arriving over an hour early each morning and waiting in the parking garage in my car. My car is like a shield I can pull … Continue reading That time I got trapped in a burning parking garage

Meds: the side effect trade off

You’ve all seen the pharmaceutical commercials in which the narrator quietly rushes through a list of horrible side effects like a more soft-spoken version of the micro machines guy. It’s become comedic fodder for legions of stand-up acts because of the absurd disparity between positive and negative effects. “This’ll get rid of your toenail fungus, but it might cause anal leakage and/or death.” Well, I’ve … Continue reading Meds: the side effect trade off

Nice Guys

Do they finish last because they’re nice? Or is there some other reason? When I was a young idiot, about 18 years old, behaving and thinking much like the kinds of kids that get on my fuckin’ nerves in 2018, I fancied myself a “nice guy.” I couldn’t figure out how to get a girlfriend. I’d had one in High School, but that fizzled out … Continue reading Nice Guys

Trying too hard

I’ve recently come to the conclusion that striving for literary success is a fruitless endeavor. All the pushy marketing and shameless plugging…I’ve decided to simply be myself, do what I do, and stop attempting to fit into the “writer” box. Granted, I haven’t been “attempting” very hard, if it all, lately. But I have in the past, and looking back on that I feel slightly … Continue reading Trying too hard

When I was a child…

I didn’t speak as a child. I didn’t think as a child. Not in the traditional sense. And yet I’m still waiting to become a “man” so that I can finally put away those childish things. What things? Oh, depression, anxiety, perpetual emotional turbulence. These things have always been with me. My memory goes as far back as the age of three, and my earliest … Continue reading When I was a child…